Learn from villains in the workplace
Everyone is a villain?
Learn from villains in the workplace
“The lady who is farting again went to the CEO’s office to make a small report.
And the selfish gentleman, I asked him to fill out a report for me, but he refused, it was really annoying.
“The Analects” neutron said: “Only women and villains are difficult to raise.
“The aversion to villains has almost become an ancient melody in interpersonal sciences.
But we have been thinking from the perspective of the “guardian” thought. From another perspective, the “little man” is not as useless as people think.
They also have the positive qualities we lack.
In fact, “little man” is another me in the world.
In the latest issue of Taiwan’s “Health” magazine, look at these colleagues from a different perspective and learn the advantages behind their shortcomings.
How to treat “little people” to form a new kind of interpersonal relationship science, which is not only about their own psychology, but also about other people’s philosophical thinking, or a sociological meaning booster, power valve, and the advantages of villains are yet to be seen.The ghost of discovery.
Everyone is a villain?
Today, Fan Pao Pao is still living in people’s attention.
On December 23, 2008, Fan Paoran took a high-profile post in Beijing, but his time on the podium was postponed indefinitely in public opinion.
People once again attracted a new round of humanity debate, but Ke Fan ran and said: I think they are pretending to be forced.
And recently, Lu Zeng said on his blog: “If you marry someone, you will marry ‘Fan Pao Pao’!
“It adds another episode to this famous debate.
Her reason is “real villain!
Far better than a hypocrite!
“But Lu once made a conceptual mistake. A villain is not the same as a hypocrite. It is a pseudo-proposition in itself.
Hypocrite is actually a villain, in which the concept is the same.
So what is a villain?
After observation, the ancients once summarized the classic appearance of villains-“Eagle nose has a concave eye, and dwarves do not need a knife to kill. The most difficult thing is one eye, and one eye can’t fight the water snake waist.”
But it turns out that this is purely based on appearance and is not believed.
In The Analects of Confucius, Confucius often talked about the villain with his disciples. He said that “a villain is better than a profit”, and that “a villain is always a relative”.
According to statistics, there are as many as 24 criticisms of villains in the book.
In summary, the characteristics of villains are obvious: seeing the wind makes the rudder, flattery flattery, manipulating right and wrong, falling into trouble, and using whatever means to achieve the goal.
This is the “little man” in everyone’s mind.
What is a gentleman?
The ancients said: “The gentleman’s self also respects people without having to show respect, and loves people without having to see love.
Those who love and respect oneself; also see those who love and respect.
A gentleman must be in himself, not in others, but in himself.
Probably means that respecting others without others must also respect themselves, and caring for others without others must also care for themselves.
Respect and care are your own business, and being respected and cared for by others is your business. A gentleman must strictly ask himself and not care whether others have repaid himself. As long as he is strict with himself, he will be appreciated by the society.
Even if there is no postmodern deconstruction, most people will think that such people are purely silly.
The villain and the gentleman are actually two sides of the same body.
Some critics say: The most annoying person is another me in the world.
This is true. If this sentence is extended, the villain is actually another gentleman.
It’s just that the difference is that the villain dares to do it, but the gentleman does not want to do it.
For example, public opinion criticized Fan Pingpao. Former leader of the Ministry of Education Wang Xuming said: We can not be lofty, but we cannot allow shame.
Is Fan really shameless?
In “Moving the Mountain That Moment”, can we really be selfless?
And patted his chest and promised: I will never leave the students alone?
In fact, to a certain extent, Fan Paowan is honest and brave.
He faced the dark side of his heart, while most people hid behind the computer screen and gave pointers to things they couldn’t do.
Who is the villain?
2 The most annoying person is another one in the world, Tao Chaojie, a psychological consultant at Kunming Subway Training Center, I believe: Each human resource seeks to maximize its own interests.
The villain and the gentleman are actually different in the way they choose to achieve their goals, but they are both the products of socialization and they are also neutral.
In modern society, a sad perception is that in the way of interpersonal relations, there is no such thing as “gentleman” and “little man”, only “interest” and “gain and loss”.
Just like a tree, the sunny side is green and gloomy, and the shady side is dark and gloomy. Our so-called gentleman is just talking about one side. Maybe we brag ourselves. But when we face some things and some situations,Really fit the gentleman’s way?
The reason why people dislike “little people” is that they often “little people get the will”. Under the psychological effects of humiliation, anger, and jealousy, people naturally can only say harshly: hum!
Just a villain.
Psychologist Xiao Dan believes that there is fierce competition in the workplace and everyone is trying to get out, but not all efforts can be rewarded accordingly.
When a person cannot get the expected affirmation and lacks the sense of introspection, it is easy to find the cause objectively.
The simplest cure for pain and pain is to look for imaginary enemies and “demonize” them into villains, intentionally or unintentionally.
“The open gun is easy to hide, and the dark arrow is difficult to prevent.” Because the other party is a villain and is used to conspiracy and trickery, I will lose. It is completely excusable.
Who is most likely to be an imaginary enemy?
Usually it’s tough opponents, or ambitious, aggressive people.
There are always some people in the workplace that are unpleasant. They are either invisible or aggressive at work, but when they have the opportunity, they show their wolf and spare no effort to become their own interests.
The fact that the character is placed in the middle has brought a lot of pressure and leakage to the people around it, and it has naturally become the imaginary enemy and villain in the hearts of others.
In fact, whether it is a gentleman or a villain, once positioned, it will become extreme.
Liu Bang rogue broke his promise, Zhao Kuangyong roared recklessly, Xiang Yu and Cao Cao divided Xiaoxiong and Xiongxiong, but they either became the honor of the Ninth Five-Year Plan or could dominate one side.
In terms of gentlemen or villains, how should they judge?
Furthermore, such as the intriguing battles commonly used on the battlefield, to provoke alienation, the “36 tactics” that the Chinese people talk about, are these “little people” means extremely sinful?
The villain has the calamity of the villain, but the gentleman has the calamity of the gentleman.
In the history of China, events such as the death of Song Ru are not uncommon.
In the real world, when “little people” are entangled in their careers, people known as “gentlemen” are often depressed and frustrated.
Was it framed by a “little man”?
Or is it the wrong strategy?
Thinking too stale and too restrained?
We have been considering the issue from the perspective of the “guardian”, in fact, the “little man” is not as useless as everyone said.
The most annoying person is another me in the world.
How to treat “little people” has formed a new kind of interpersonal relationship science. It is not only about one’s own psychology, but also about other people’s philosophical thinking. It is also a sociological meaning booster and power valve.
The advantage of villains is the ghost to be found.
3 Switching from nasty mode to learning mode You worry-free, once did a survey: what to do if you meet a villain?
The data shows that there are 24.
78% of people chose to endure in silence. Similar to the votes obtained, the option of “clarify the facts directly with the boss” was 23, a total of 23.78% ratio.
There are 14.
06% of the stakeholders believe that it is necessary to counterattack the villain’s action of grabbing power. The so-called magic height is one foot, the morality is one foot tall, and the villain must not be palliated and raised.
66% of people think that to deal with villains, they must unite other people and exert their collective power, so that the villain no longer has his place to live; of course, there are relatively modest ways, 12.
14% of people think they can’t afford to hide, just stay away and don’t care about your villain.
We obviously have no cure for villains.
Because there is very little we can do to hate this tricky issue.
“New Weekly” mentioned that there are two worms on the human body: one is a poor worm, and the other is a nasty worm.
Poor insects bring compassion when they are out, and hate insects cause dislike and dislike when they occur.
The proverb says: the poor must have hate; it lacks the following sentence: the hate must have learnable approach.
Research on the hate mechanism, psychologists said, “When we hate someone, it is often because they have the same shortcomings as us.
“The other party exposed our shortcomings, so we will also express the emotions we hate him.
This is a secret that hates happening.
And this dislike is sometimes inexplicable and advancing with the times. Just like when we were watching “Dream of Red Mansions” when we were young, we really hated Xue Baodi. She thought that her mind was deep in her steps and killed her frank Lin Daiyu. But after going through social training, you can seeIn fact, Xue Baozhen is not a bad person, but a pragmatist who understands balanced relationships and is good at handling interpersonal relationships.
We like Lin Daiyu because she wants to live sexually like her in the depths of her heart.
Sadly, everyone who wants to make a difference in the workplace may end up accepting Xue Baoyi’s disgusting lifestyle.
Management master Drucker overthrows the experience of his predecessors, that is, outstanding leaders must have excellent qualities, which can be said to be “ten advantages of successful managers”.
Beautiful words such as persistence, bravery, perseverance, determination, high emotional quotient, communication skills, and resistance to pressure are simply incarnations of leaders. People have always thought that why the other party is the boss and the boss, and they are subordinates and migrant workers, becauseLeaders do not possess good qualities.
Drucker’s research found that the so-called all-rounder is too hard to find, and some individuals who meet the conditions show that their work is extremely beneficial.
Drucker finds differences between great leaders just like other professions such as doctors, teachers, and violinists.
There is no such thing as a perfect avatar, and people must face all kinds of discomfort with others.
So how do we treat villains?
Most people choose to stay away and this is actually not the most useful method.
Fanfan CEO Wang Jipeng has his own unique whetstone theory, thinking that the person you hate is because he has a conflict in your subconscious.
When you meet people of the same type, you don’t have any fear.
But when you meet different types of people, you have conflicts in character, temperament, ability, and concept.
These people exist to sharpen your knife.
People who want to improve need to be with someone you feel uncomfortable with.
The more painful and annoying you are, the more annoying people can sharpen your knife sharper.
Wang Jipeng’s theory is a bit extreme, and some people think that it is purely nothing to find.
But it is just that the aversion to villains often causes friction at work and mutual annoyance.
Someone on Douban has set up a group called “I Hate XX”. The introduction of the group is very interesting, saying “Speak out the creature / thing you hate, and let us spit him / her / it together”.
This little nasty alliance has become a window for venting radiant energy.
If society is regarded as an organic whole, villains are only a minority, and their existence has the function of a scavenger, which can make people see the existence and deficiencies clearly.
If we put “hate” aside and look at the problem rationally, we will find that the villain’s well-being is often the function of the hate factor on them.
If a person in the company always feels that the people around him are villains, then it just means that he has a problem.
In the workplace, IQ makes you appreciate, and EQ makes you live better.
But to succeed, IQ is as important as EQ.
How to treat villains?Switching from nasty mode to learning mode is the best way to treat things around you.
How to treat heterogeneous molecules, tolerate, penetrate, appreciate, accept, or prejudice?
The learning mode test not only tests the individual’s temperament, but also shows a mental maturity.
We hate the existence of villains, because that is also a person we are not capable of.
There is no reason not to learn from him.
And when we give up the worldly perspective and think calmly, we realize that many abilities, hard work and endurance are actually worth learning.
Learning without rules, learning from villains does not mean that we will become villains.
The process of real learning is actually an organic combination of collection, screening and fusion.
As the “New Weekly” said: hate is braking, learning is stepping on the accelerator, in the historical fast lane of economic acceleration, hate to make people sober; and in the stalled lane of the current financial crisis, learning makes people progress.
The “little man” has two sides and three swords, and he must look at the six ways to deceive and hide, and listen to all directions. This kind of divine power needs to be accumulated normally.
Have you ever noticed what the company needs?
What do you need for your project?
What does the boss need?
What do colleagues need?
This is the observation point of these villain groups.
However, you often do not know the height, the direction, and the state you don’t need, which will affect the work process.
It is very important to affect the speed of the company’s development and to know everything and everyone’s needs.
The boss needs a “little man” to tell them what they want to hear, what they want to know.
Small groups represent networks, as long as they do not maliciously rule out dissidents, they can promote work, and at the same time you can get more information from it.
The boss should take the initiative to ask the opinion of the small group’s opinion leader, stimulate his honor, and defeat the small group to the benefit of the company.
The “little man” is good at discerning and observing colors, using clever words to satisfy others’ vanity.
From another perspective, they know more about smoothness and life skills.
For example, the boss proposed a plan. When we ignored the boss’s inner feelings and complexion, and we still had to be realistic about what we were doing in our heart, and insisted on the idea of being honest, the “little man” began to praise and accept this planAlthough he (she) also knows that this program is outstanding and even impossible to achieve.
Then, the “little man” will continue to use the “advice” of his superiors and ask his superiors to guide the step-by-step practice, and gradually work with his superiors to practice this plan.
If in the process, the boss finds that it can’t be realized, the boss will stop himself, but if the plan is realized, then it is self-evident that who can get the approval of the boss from the root.
”Little people” are good at helping their bosses achieve the effects of emotional transfer and decision buffering.
Ranking of employees, the limit of responsibility shouldered by the boss.
When making a decision, we must also go through the process of ideological struggle.
In the process, it will be full of anxiety, uneasiness and even pain.
The villain knows the difficulties of the boss, and knows how to do it, and will take measures to timely adjust the painful mood of the boss in a timely manner, and may also avoid the emotional impact of the leader because of thisHow and how things are handled.
We take orders from our bosses, and we also need to manage and care for our bosses.
The “little man” has the ability to withstand setbacks and a persistent mentality, and is good at emotional management.
Honest people often become angry when faced with inequality, and express their views in a relatively fierce way, otherwise they will avoid problems with a negative attitude.
Unfairness is actually a workplace ecology.
But what about little people?
He still managed to smile, and that was one of the keys to success.
The flexibility of the “little man” allows him to take fewer detours in the process of success.
There is nothing wrong with integrity, but blindness leads to more detours and avoids more frustrations that might have been avoided.
In Zhou Xingchi’s “Nine Pin Sesame Officer”, before the death of Bao Longxing’s father, there was a classic line, which is to be a corrupt official, and to be a clean official, he must be more treacherous, otherwise, how can he fight them.
In addition, “little people” must be people with high emotional intelligence.He can be a villain, he must have more skills than you. As for how to conceal the truth, how to make the boss satisfied, and how you are satisfied, this also requires a bit of careful study of everyone’s emotions and the spirit of needs.
There are humanoids in the office, and they stick to their supervisors. Perhaps their work performance is not outstanding, but they can be appreciated by their superiors.
These so-called “horses” are actually masters of communicating with people.
Those “horses” make use of the communication methods recognized by supervisors, making supervisors think they are easy-going, caring, and adaptable, so they will be given more opportunities for promotion or salary increase.
When the team brings benefits to the company, there are always people who receive special awards, and when they are held accountable for their faults, they can also retreat from their bodies. Such people are often considered “little people who have fought for success.”
In fact, “competitiveness” precisely reflects their strong “self-promotion” ability and know how to grasp the focus of their work; “overcoming” shows their ability to deal with crises. They often have a sense of crisis and can plan ahead before the crisis, Calmly respond to the crisis.